It’s that time of year; the kids are going back to college. They have been home with us for much of the summer and it’s been a dream for this family. But, this time as they leave, it is most likely for good. I mean I shouldn’t complain; it is all my fault, we raised them this way. I shouldn’t be upset; it is all my fault – basically another Mom Fail of sorts.

For the past 19 years, we focused on raising strong, independent, smart, and caring people. Well, we did it and in the process, we sent them to camp in the mountains of New York and sent them around the world. So, this whole leaving thing I am used to. But, this just feels different.

mom fails world travelThey went off to camp for 8 weeks and came home and went to school. They traveled the world, but came home and went to school. They went to college, but came home for the summer to intern, because we asked them to. David and I knew in our hearts that this would be the last time as their parents we would have this extended time together. It has been wonderful; just the four of us. Given we moved to Omaha in the process and they know NO ONE, it has been wonderful. But, now it feels, oh so, different.

mom fails college kids

As we prepare for them to leave and pack them up, it is what is getting me the most. I think it’s because their “stuff” is not here. Sam left all of his “stuff” in storage at school and Sydney has all of hers at my parents. She is moving to NYC for the fall and my parents house is close to both Sam’s school and NYC. I really, as a mom, don’t have much to do to prepare them. They have this. As proud as this makes me to have them prepared, I am sad, too.

And, why this feeling they will not be home again? Well, I know they will be home to visit, but in reality, it will be a few days here and there. My son has already started to apply for internships (not in Omaha) for next summer and he spends most of the winter break training in Puerto Rico for diving. He has also already started his work on studying abroad.

And Sydney, well, she has a whole new adventure starting in dance in NYC in a professional dance program. Her life and future will be drawn out in the next few months and between school and dance, her life will not be here in Omaha, either. I am so so happy, yet I am sitting here and crying (out come sunglasses and on my face while everyone in the coffee shop watches me sit here and cry).

mom fails college kids

It’s a Mom Fail only in our success as parents that our hearts hurt a little. We will miss them dearly as we watch from literally half way across the country. The success of raising these wonderful young adults that we will continue to support is only a failure in the fact they will not be sitting here at my kitchen counter eating their favorite foods that I’ve fixed; doing homework; or just sharing their day with me. They will not come running into our room to share a funny video or just sit and talk. This failure and little bit of heartache is a success in the grandest way.

Is it too early to drink?

mom fails champagne