what a triwife does when the triathlete is at a racee

triathlete going to races alone

During a recent race season, my husband went to two races without me. The first time it was due to my dog having surgery for cancer and the second time, it was because I couldn’t find a sitter. It was really disappointing as one race was in Frankfurt, Germany. But, oh well, life happens and there’s always the chance he’ll go back to race it again. At least that’s the story he’s sticking to…


Anyway, this got me thinking about what we, as triwives/partners, do when we’re not at a race with our triathlete. Does life go on as usual or do we do something special for ourselves? I asked some of you at the races I did attend, but am only now getting around to putting all of your answers together. Sorry…A lot of you had the same sentiments, so I just pulled out a few examples.

  • On the morning of Ironman Germany, I went for a golf lesson and then stayed at the driving range to hit some balls. I was so nervous for him as he wanted to win a spot to Kona and thought it would take my mind off the race. And, it worked. A fellow tripartner sent me text updates of how Carl was doing, so it made my life easy.
  • I always try and get together with my friends as it doesn’t always work out when my husband’s home. This is a great opportunity for us to catch up and stay out late. Party! Well, not really, but thought it sounded good. I’m probably home by 10pm and in bed by 10:30! My husband has trained me well and isn’t that pathetic…
  • OMG, I love having the time to myself. I even encourage him to go to a race without me. The house is so nice and quiet and there’s no arguing over the fact that he’s doing a 5 hour bike ride on the weekend when I want to spend time together.triathlete goes to a race without the family
  • I get to watch movies that he doesn’t want to see. This usually means a foreign film, because he HATES foreign films or I’ll watch anything with Jason Stratham!
  • Generally, my life gets a lot tougher. We have 3 kids under 10, so when he’s gone, I have total responsibility and little to no free time. As you can imagine, this is less than an ideal situation and I’m not always in a great mood when he gets home! That said, it’s a toss up as to which takes more work for me – staying home with the kids by myself or lugging everyone to a race. Do I sound terrible?
  • Okay, you may not believe I do this, but I actually cook things that I want to eat and either are a bit decadent which my husband won’t eat in training or he just doesn’t like. I love homemade mac and cheese with tons of cheese and bread crumbs on top and he would never eat this.
  • I really like when my husband goes by himself to a race, because I get some alone time with my daughter. I work during the week and on weekends, we try our best to do things as a family. When my husband is gone, it gives us a chance to do mother and daughter activities and this makes me very happy – I think my daughter, too.triathlete - what a triwife does when he's at a race
  • I catch up on sleep. I don’t have to get up at the crack of dawn, because he has to work out.
  • This will be a long-winded answer…It depends on how long he’s gone. If it’s just overnight, either it’s business as usual or I might do something like give myself a facial. If it’s for a longer period of time, which rarely happens because it’s probably someplace I want to go to also, like what is called a destination race, I might actually go visit a friend. We don’t have kids, so unless work keeps me at home, I can venture off on my own.

WHAT DO YOU DO WHILE YOUR TRIATHLETE IS AT A RACE WITHOUT YOU?