I am (big gulp), a middle-aged wife of a middle-aged triathlete GETTING FIT AT 46. What’s the difference? Well, middle-aged triathletes are in their prime. Let me explain…They typically are at the height of their endurance and physical fitness – they look pretty darn good, too; have reached a place in their career that financially allows them to buy nice “toys”, great coaches, and other “members of their training team”, and that gives them more flexibility in their work schedule; and many of their kids are grown or at least older, so they don’t have to make as many sacrifices or choices where the family is concerned.
Then, there is the middle-aged triwife…Granted, I, too, could be a triathlete if I wanted, but that’s never going to happen. Instead, I will sit here sometimes feeling guilty for having a harder time dropping that last 8 pounds, having thyroid issues, and every other issue that comes with being a woman, including emotional eating and menopause. All the while, I have to be the support and backbone for my triathlete, during all of his emotional ups and downs. I mean seriously, in the real world, men just seem to have it easier, but I’m sure my husband would take issue with this statement. What about yours?
Okay, I said it and feel better letting it out. But really, it is a pain sometimes. I am learning to get over this guilt and realize, based on his training, there are lessons I can learn. I get up each day and exercise, I eat right, and I stay positive. One of the best things I did for myself was to apply for and be accepted as a Fit Fluential Ambassador. The inspiration from other Ambassadors and being held accountable is most important to me.
So, how am I doing it? I’ve had to work really hard to find the balance just like everyone else and most importantly, ownership. It’s been such a struggle trying to keep up with my trihubby’s training schedule, nutrition requirements, my desire to keep a real food home, his work, my work, my travel, the twins, and not to mention the 3 dogs. So, I chose to own it all and own my middle-aged womanhood and realize it’s all OKAY!
Here are my tips for how I try to stay guilt free or at least try to work hard at getting fit at 46, while married to a triathlete:
- Acceptance – He is the triathlete not me. I don’t want to be. I love being a runner.
- Health – I see my doctor twice a year to monitor my thyroid levels, because it does affect my weight, mood, and sleep.
- Nutrition – I eat a clean diet and eat what I cook for my trihubby, just a lot less. He eats like a teenage boy! I can’t!
- No Deprivation – I own that I need comfort food once in a while and enjoy it, without any guilt.
- Meal Preparation – I cook 100% of what we eat in the house including, our bread and yogurt.
- Pets – I walk the dogs a lot and spend time relaxing with them! It’s good for them and great for me.
- Finding Time – I stay active when I travel, working out in my hotel room and making sure I hike, walk, and run.
- Inspiration – I read a lot of blogs from other Fit Fluential Ambassadors to stay motivated.
- Kids – I talk to or text with the twins a few times a week, just to have that comfort.
- Marriage – I have an awesome trihubby who supports me and what I do and he never makes me feel guilty for being me. So, yes, the guilt is all self-imposed and I have finally learned to own it!
– DANA
DO YOU FEEL GUILT LIVING WITH A TRIATHLETE? IF SO, HOW HAVE YOU DEALT WITH IT?
Sherry is one of the TriWivesClub and LifeDoneWell co-founders and contributes to multiple blogs. She is a former co-owner of the California Apparel News and had a career in the healthcare industry. Her passions include traveling, real food, the environment, and animal rescue/welfare. She lives a healthy lifestyle and has been a vegetarian since 1987. She and her husband are parents to two rescue pups and reside in Connecticut.
I appreciate your honesty Dana. I can relate to all of what you say including the comparison to our husbands. I had similar thoughts posted today 🙂
Thanks Tara. I know we can relate – good and bad! I tried to find some positive and a way out, so to speak, that worked best for me. Having the kids off to college has certainly played a factor, too.
I had to comment that you look amazing at 46. Age is just a number, but you wear it darn well!
You’re too sweet. Thanks so much Jen. I’ll take any compliment…