They say don’t worry. The infant stage will pass. You’ll make it through the terrible twos and chasing a pre-schooler. Oh, the teenage years go so fast and then you’ll get used to being an empty nester. They say it will be easier…Public Service Announcement…IT DOES NOT GET EASIER!
Yes, the manual labor stops and it should be a period of pure happiness for your kids. They have their first real job. They are managing their budget. You gave them a great childhood, a college education, and taught them how to watch their money and plan for their future.
As a result your heart will feel a huge tug when…wait for it… you cut the Amazon Prime cord. Almost certainly, it will rip your heart out.
Just wait until you’re told, “I have my own Amazon Prime account now”. You are all like cool, that’s great. Until you realize, just like feeding them when they were young, they no longer need you for your Amazon Prime account. What’s next? Is it the family cell calling plan? Your Netflix account?
Maybe they will need you in other ways, but really, now you cannot check out what they are watching and what they are buying. Now, they no longer need your account. (insert sobbing mother).
People say you have to cut the umbilical cord. But what does that really mean. I have raised two strong, independent, self sufficient, and kind humans. How dare they turn on me and not need my Amazon Prime account? But you know what? I don’t call that holding on or needing to cut the umbilical cord. I call it another success that breaks your heart. You know that word bittersweet?
Most of all, when it comes to raising kids it is more like – Oh, great, the kids are doing well and don’t need me anymore. Parenting does not get easier. It just changes and hurts in other ways.
First, they tell you they have their own Amazon Prime account.
Next, they are asking for their own airline and hotel loyalty numbers.
Where does it end?
They take all that is theirs and take care of it themselves. Yes, go ahead and say it – “That’s great”! Sure, it is great for everything, but my heart. Well, and now I can’t take advantage of their miles…
But do not worry for one minute. I have told them loud and clear how proud I am of them and how hard this is for me. Why would I do that? Why would I make them feel bad you may ask? I didn’t. I was just honest with them. We discussed how I felt so that they would know I am here for them. They still need to need me. Rather they still need to need me for me!
Go ahead, say it. Say what everyone says to parents at this stage, which is the WRONG thing to say. “This is so great you want them to be independent and you can go find other things to do.” OR “Now you can create your second life”. Well, I don’t need to. I know who I am and I love my life. I am busy and enjoy the people I surround myself with. And above it all, I really like myself.
There are many things that parents are told over the years. They are offered many opinions, given many ways to do things, and given advice they really do not need. And yes, I am going to be one of those parents.
Being a parent is what I always wanted to be. I will always be a parent. I am so happy I have role models that showed me the way. Therefore, here is my one piece of advice…
From the cut of the umbilical cord to the cut of the Amazon Prime cord, parenting tugs at your heart. Allow it to. Savor each and every moment, every tear, every tug at your heart. Because each stage goes by quickly.
So, you ask, “What is the Parenting Fail? Well, it is once again success. You created this path for your child to independence. You created this tug at your heart. It is your own doing! Above all, savor that salty tear. Because, most certainly, it is bittersweet success.
I am a home cook that does things my way. In my kitchen, I make breakfast, pack lunches, prepare snacks, and cook dinner. During the week, we eat real food that is homemade, organic, and local. On the weekends we do explore more of our local restaurants. I bake my own bread, juice fresh oranges every other day, and make my own kombucha and other weekly favorites.